9 Adar (purim)

The Targum on Esther 6,10 says that when Haman was told by Achashverosh to give honor to Mordechai he asked Achashverosh to just kill him (haman) and not decree that he has to honor Mordechai. If he was willing to be killed, why not just refuse to bring Mordechai and be killed for being a morid bemalchus or commit suicide? (Also Mordehai is a dead man. Just honor him now and in a few months he'll be dead! Why would he rather die now?)